William has been living it up in heaven for 4 months and 23 days. While I am super excited for him to be experiencing the presence of God, I am a little jealous that he is there before me. The Bible tells us that heaven is a place of no worries, no wants and and complete peace. I am grateful that he can have that now. While there are no guarantees that life on earth will be without pain, it makes us long for the promises of heaven even more.
Back here on earth, we miss him like crazy. We want him to return and hope that he'll just show up and we can go back on with normal. I never understood what permanency was until I couldn't call or see him any more. That there is absolutely no way to undo what has happened. It's not like getting upset with someone and trying to make amends and they avoid your phone calls. It's not like he went away to college and will be back for Christmas break. He's never coming back. He'll never be at another family function. This is forever. Coming to terms with this is hard, but the good news is that I know that I will see him again. He'll be able to give me my tour of heaven and I can't wait!
As I think about my little brother and all the things we did together, our family moments and the things that were important to him, I am reminded of a time when he wanted to participate in Out of the Darkness—a walk sponsored by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. He and mom were supposed to do that walk together. Earlier this summer we (Lauren, Jillian, PJ and I) played on a softball team in memory of William because he'd wanted to play. This October family members and I will be walking in the Out of the Darkness walk in memory of William.
What is it?
A walk to save lives. In the United States, a person dies by suicide every 16 minutes, claiming more than 32,000 lives each year. It is estimated that an attempt is made every minute; with close to one million people attempting suicide annually.
By walking in the 2008 Out of the Darkness Community Walks to benefit the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention (AFSP), you will be walking with thousands of people nationwide to raise money for AFSP's vital research and education programs to prevent suicide and save lives, increase national awareness about depression and suicide, and assist survivors of suicide loss.
If you are interested, there are two ways you get get involved. The first is walking with us on October 4 at Busse Woods in Elk Grove Village (just east of Woodfield Mall in Schaumburg). You can register on the Out of the Darkness Website. The second way to get involved is to support us by donating to our fundraising goal.
| Out of the Darkness | |
| URL | Out of the Darkness Website |
| Date | Saturday, October 4 |
| Walk Time | 11:00 a.m. to 1:00 p.m. |
| Check-in Time | 10:00 a.m. to 11:00 a.m. |
| Location | Busse Woods in Elk Grove Village, IL |
| Registration Cutoff | Friday, October 3 |
| Our Team Name | William J. Hartmann II |
| Participation Packet | More details are available in this PDF |
My personal fundraising goal is set at $500 right now. If you would like to sponsor me and make a donation through December 31, 2008, you can by clicking on: make a donation. You can also submit a check made payable to AFSP.
We are truly grateful for all of your support, whether a listening ear, a word of encouragement, lifting us up in prayer, or through your participating in Out of the Darkness in memory of William. Thank you!
Love,
Monica and family
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